doku | VISIONS I HAD BURIED UNDERGROUND / RETURNING TO ABUSE US

[There's no reason to feel guilty, Nariko. He wants to be tied up by someone. He wants to be tied up by her. He's very well committed to the idea, though he's quite good at keeping it in the back of his mind and not sweating about it.]

Yeah.

[He looks over his shoulder to look at himself in the mirror.]

It feels good. It makes me feel way more comfortable than the older stuff.

[You could hear the confidence in his voice, too. It was the same reason why he wore his masks on stage so often, but like this...he might not need them anymore. The label thing applies a lot here--changing up his style assures that it's his own identity, not the one the industry wanted him to have.]

[And even though she has no idea how it's going to work she's pretty much excited for the same thing! But for her it's a little more complicated and sort of goes back to when they first met. But, well, thankfully none of that is relevant so she can continue to repress it.]

Then I think you've answered your own question: You're ready for something new, and this is it!

[She gets up and flutters around a bit - she's pulling all of the tags off of his clothes, carefully so that nothing is ripped, but this way he can just keep on wearing it for the rest of the day! No need to go back into the past.]

And now that we know where to start it's just a matter of getting a decent variety! But let's give some of the other stores a try, too!

[When they first met?]

Woah--wait, I'm supposed to walk out of here with these?

[Is that even acceptable? Doesn't it seem kinda...tacky?]

Oh, here...

[He grabs some of the other clothes that he'd liked; the others get hung up to be put away.]

These are the ones I liked too.

Why wouldn't you? You've had to wear the same stuff over and over again for the past few days!

[She wouldn't be able to fathom why it would seem tacky, so that's Krieg's own battle to wage. She makes sure to keep the tags in order even as she takes the rest of the stuff he'd ended up liking.]

Did you want to keep looking around or are we going to the next store?

[Because if he's done then she's going to get a head start on checking out.]

No, I think we're done here.

[He'll just deal with it by avoiding eye contact with the clerk. He's taking a look at the list while Nariko takes care of the checking out part, noticing that Izzy actually went through with his request for adult stores. The name looks benign enough on paper that Nariko might not notice until they walk in....but they'll have to see.]

[Krieg is saved any real embarrassment, if anything the clerk looks at Nariko and then Krieg and gives a thumbs up in a 'Nice!!' sort of gesture. It's a weird moment in time that Nariko's oblivious to because they have some really cute bracelets at the counter and she debates picking one up for herself!

When they've made it out she gets the bags in the truck and asks,] So, where too next?

[Here's your chance to surprise her with a sex store, Krieg!!]

[Krieg gives the clerk a brief, surprised expression before returning a mild smirk and a silent nod of thanks. He assumes that the gesture is in reference to the new rags, not Nariko.]

Already got one picked out.

[He's putting it into the GPS when she's getting back into her seat! He gathers a quiet little breath to quell his minor excitement before they take off.

A few minutes later, they stop in the parking lot of a place called The Black Room. He looks at her after they park, just to witness her reaction.]

Cool!

[Well that was easy! He's getting into this! Except where they end up is ... Well, it's a store that has clothes in it, sure, but not the kind he'd want to wear out in public. And a good dose of it is probably oriented towards her end of the biological spectrum, not his.]

That's a sex store. [She points at it, blinks at him.] But you knew that.

[Krieg's too smart to not know.]

[Krieg just gives her a muted, knowing look in passing as they leave the truck. He really wishes he knew what to expect out of this, but he doesn't, so...

He opens the door and lets Nariko go in first. She'll have to be his guide.]

[At first she doesn't understand why he isn't a little more excited! If it was on the list then, well, didn't that mean he wanted to come here? His sister had put it together and that probably wasn't something she'd done on her own.

Except if Krieg could be caught off guard by a little kiss then a sex shop was probably a whole other plane.

She wraps her arm around one of his while they're greeted by the clerks - a young woman with insanely pink hair and a slightly older guy with facial piercings. Nariko greets them right back and then just looks around!] Wow, this place is pretty big.

[There's a good section for DVDs and magazines, a whole wall dedicated to women's sex toys, a section for couples, a grand array of condoms, lube, lingerie, and ... a different section for everything BDSM related. Sure, the basic stuff is all over the other sections but that areas probably just a little more hardcore. That aside it's a well lit, clean place, and they've even got decent music playing!]

Oh, that's cute!

[It's a tight leather dress, criminally minuscule skirt included!] Fuck, that's not going to fit my boobs, though ...

[Excuse her Krieg she's going to try and look for her size!! But, mostly, she's going to be calm about this and hope he can kind of feed off of that. If he feels comfortable breaking away from her that's fine! Either way she's going to make her way to the ropes and such since that's probably what he came here for. Anything else she finds for herself is a bonus.]

[Yeah, he's definitely in need of getting his feet wet. But he's already put his swim trunks on, metaphorically speaking, so it's not like he's forcing himself into this against his will.

Krieg is nervous and excited--and really, really glad that Nariko is here, because she seems like she's totally at home. Eventually, he gets the courage to wander off on his own for a few minutes, muttering under his breath.]

It's weird to see all this stuff in person...

[They seemed so fictional since he's only seen them in pictures and videos! Now he can go and...touch this kind of stuff.

Which he does. A lot. While she's looking through those leather dresses, he comes back to Nariko's side and plops a military officer's hat on her head. One that would go with what she's looking at!]

[She's proud of him for going off on his own! It takes a good amount of work to refrain from letting him know that he can call her if he needs anything. Krieg's perfectly grown, but her fretting doesn't know age. With a deep breathe she turns back to the dresses and finds the largest possible size, one that's far more likely to hold her curves. By the time Krieg has returned she's got it draped over one arm, and is picking up an incredibly sizable dildo. It's one that's designed to stuck to a shower wall so ... Maybe not a mental image he wanted, sorry partner.]

Oh, hey!

[She rights it on her head and tilts to look in a nearby mirror. It's cute!] Been over here yet?

[The question's there but she heads towards the restraints and such either way.] So, I didn't think to ask this before, but do you know about the differences between ropes and all that? I mean, I feel like you're going more for a jute angle, but if you're not used to at least forty-five minutes then I think hemp is a lot better.

[Feelings about rope.]

[No mental picture given. In fact, he’s wondering how the hell she’s going to use it, given that the shower’s barely wide enough to bend over in. Then again, he has a biased point of view, because with how tall he is, he has to get out of the shower in order to pick anything up he’s dropped. It’s kind of a pain.

The second thought he has is how huge it is. Seriously. He’s big but that thing makes him look tiny in comparison.]

Actually, I was coming over here to ask you for your opinion. I’m only used to, um…nylon.

[God, saying it out loud makes him sound like such a rookie. He underestimates the wisdom of his choice, given that the slickness is best for self-bondage as he could use household appliances to loosen it. Standing next to someone more experienced, it feels like showing off your training wheels instead of taking pride in the fact you learned how to ride the bike at all.]

Whichever leaves better red marks at the end of the day.

[He's underestimating what tiny, bendy women can do, basically. She'll have to be creative about it, sure, but it's more than possible.

More importantly? He makes it far too easy to spot his own lack of confidence, unwarranted as it is.] A very good start, then! It probably just doesn't have the roughness you're looking for, that's all. [And she'd kind of argue that had it's own benefits, since not every situation was made for showing off your bondage markings.]

Okay, so ...

[She reaches up on her tip toes to get a good length of nylon, in black.] For you. [And then two more times.] For you and me. [One grab for some beautiful, pearly white bamboo silk rope.] And this one's just for me! So we've got the basics and the 'probably going to leave abrasions for at least a day or more' stuff, now there's just - shit.

[She points up a little higher on the apparent bondage wall.] Can you get those?

[Medical shears, for just in case.]

[He forgets that people aren't twelve story brick shithouses like him, even though he's used to looking at the tops of their heads. He goes ahead and snatches up those medical shears for her, because reaching for high up things is his job as a twelve story brick shithouse.]

A variety sounds like a good idea. I hope we don't have to use these, though.

[The shears. They're nice rope...]

Thank you.

[The tiny nympho is grateful, friend.]

'People are more important than ropes'.

[And they can always buy more of it. Nariko can't buy another Krieg! Or even an android version of him!] But I'm sure it'll be fine. It's just that you only need one ER visit to impress upon you the importance of having them nearby, just in case.

[That'd been a wild Thursday night.] Alright, let me get some condoms and then I'll be ready!

[And since they don't have sugar free flavored ones she has to go with the boring fifty count box, and then she's done. Anything else you want, Krieg?]

No, I know, but...

[She hasn't spotted his combat knives yet, has she? Hmm. But these are probably safer to use, so he lets the thought trail off when she picks up a box of condoms. He opens his mouth to say something, then closes it. Of course those are for other people, but if she's serious about riding him...]

Um.

[Is there a way to say this without being a braggart.]

We're gonna need...bigger ones.

[She knows, doesn't she? She's seen it! She hasn't seen it erect, though...]

[No, she hasn't, if she had there'd have been a conversation about why he has combat knives at all. Anyway, she doesn't notice that he's trying to bring something up and is instead heading for the front counter, arms full. When he does speak up she stops, though! And looks a little confused until he gets the words out.]

Krieg, these are pretty big for starting out.

[Considering that she points at one of the sets of rope, she doesn't realize he's talking about the condoms! To be completely fair she didn't get a real look at his package at all, she'd glanced and then felt horrible for even trying. How would she feel if a guy just stared at her ... That's an awful example, since she'd probably enjoy it to some extent, depending on who it was.]

[Because he's a giant fucking tryhard. No, not really, he just finds it really comforting to have a weapon on him.]

I'm not talking about the rope, Iko.

[He points to the box of condoms.]

[She looks to where he's pointing.]

Oh! These aren't for you, though! These are for, like, random people.

[One night stands, gas station dude from back then, surprises. That kind of thing.]

Do you want me to wear a condom with you?

[UHHH..]

You're asking me that as if it's an option?

[Does she take the pill too or something? On top of that, he...

He gestures to the arm usually sleeved under his jacket.]

I've never been tested.

[No one ever told him during his blood tests so he might not actually have anything; then again, they might've just assumed he already knew, or didn't care.]

Edited 2016-04-04 02:10 (UTC)

[..... Krieg.]

You've been clean for years, right? Upwards-ish of ten?

[That's assuming he quit early at, like, sixteen, but that's probably not it at all. It's not like she ever asked the man for a timeline but mostly she's just proving a point.] It only takes those things a few months to develop into something serious, Krieg. And it's true that people with HIV can present without any symptoms, but as far as I understand you'd still have a higher chance of being sick in other ways that might indicate it.

[Fever, the rash, the headaches ... Something. But it wasn't impossible to go the whole time without presenting some kind of symptom, so:]

Also, why the hell haven't you gotten tested.

[Stern Friend Voice.]

[He scoffs.]

God, no. It's been one-thousand and fifty-six days. [Beat.] One month 'til my three-year sobersary.

[At her stern friend voice, he shrugs.]

I never worried about anything the doctors didn't tell me about. They took blood from me so often that I just...figured they'd say something if anything was amiss.

[Logical! ...right?]

[Holy shit that was recent!

But, still.]

And it doesn't drive you completely insane to not know, one hundred percent?

[Doctors were legally mandated to tell patients, right? That had to be part of their oath or something. But people could be assholes, and judgmental ones at that.]

Well. You're gonna know better than me, so you should pick the ones that'll fit. Just remember to take girth into account, and there has to be a little room at the tip, too.

[One thing she's never done is help a guy go condom shopping, and it's not like she'll be any real help since she's never so much as seen it, let alone felt it. Going bareback is so much more fun, but she can't currently think of a polite way to say 'get tested so we can have sex without condoms' and not sound a demanding, sex-addicted bitch.]

...It was never relevant?

[Check it out, his complete disregard for his well-being is showing its head again. Well...not complete disregard. He's a little better than he used to be.]

I'll be right back.

[And so he goes off to collect a meager box. They're plain, but black. Does that count for anything? He sets them on the counter as Nariko checks out, standing over her from behind. He leans down to whisper into her ear.]

I'll make an appointment when we get home after lunch.

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it took me that long for a journal misfire

an accomplishment tbh

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