I've recently learned how to scramble an egg without setting my stove on fire, if I so much as develop an allergy to them I might have a nervous breakdown.
[And do note that she didn't say 'eggs' but just 'egg'. One egg by itself! Anything more than that and she gets distracted and ends up burning it all. Do you know how exhausting it is to cook eggs one at a time in the morning, Boxer? It's ridiculous.]
Speaking of that, I need to ask you a really stupid, very human question. [And never one to draw out her own suffering she'll just go ahead and pop out with it.] Does it feel weird if you eat sea food?
[Because, yeah, he's a predator and all that, and an incredibly big one at that! But aren't they like ... His distant, much stupider cousins or something ...]
[There's not that much difference between one egg and two...
He might be able to teach her how to cook, but their schedules might not allow it, given that they'll probably choose to spend their time...otherwise. Maybe he could have her help? He has to make an awful lot of food just for himself, after all. It'd make it go a lot faster if he trained her to be his little sous chef.]
If I eat--
[He has to hold back outright laughing. He's mostly successful.]
Nariko, what do you think an apex predator of the deep sea would usually eat?
[Her attention span is questionable at best, which is essentially the problem.
Once she catches a hint of that laugh she pouts at him a bit!!! ] I mean, clams or something! [As if that would begin to sate a man with such a big frame.] I mean, so is it kind of like humans eating cows, then?
[Mostly she's just trying to understand, it's one of those little things that keeps sticking out no matter how much she tries to bury it in the back of her head.]
[As if anything will distract her from getting his attention...if you know what I mean.]
Pretty sure the most clam I'll be eating is yours in a little while.
[Oho! See what he did there? He tries to make it sound as sleazy as possible just to make it clear he isn't just hitting on her for the sake of hitting on her.]
I guess so. I'll eat almost anything that moves in the water, though. Even the poisonous ones.
[Not that the Portuguese man-o-war is like, exceptionally tasty or something, but he has and he will because he can.]
That was bad, and you should feel bad. [Except she still can't help but laugh at calling a vagina a clam. It's so ridiculous she can't take it seriously, so it's a good thing he wasn't actually trying to initiate something! And while the knowledge that he eats poisonous things is a little scary (no wonder he needs three hearts, if one stops for a while the other two can revive it!) that he eats calamari is just ...
It's just ...
She reaches down to grab a tentacle and hold it to her chest. Let her love you, Rudalfo.]
That - How is that okay.
[It's not!!! Poor tentacles. The only way she can really understand this is to literally imagine eating a human arm or something which is pretty horrifying!]
[... Okay that makes sense but she clearly struggles to accept it because she's just that stubborn. And she's beginning to catch onto the fact that he's awful, while simultaneously admitting to herself that she likes it in him. Rudalfo gets a kiss before she says anything.]
Fine. I mean, it's not like I thought you sang 'Under the Sea' with the marine life or anything, but ...
[But she'd never had cause to think about it, so the whole thing felt weirdly fantastical.] As long as no one tries to eat you, it's fine.
[It's not exactly possible given the depth of her skin tone but if she could, Nariko would have blanched in that moment. That he can grow them back isn't concerning or even particularly upsetting, it's that -]
Why would anyone want to?
[While it stands to reason that there are less pleasant ocean denizens the bay is too populated for that kind of violence, right? That's ... Sort of what she'd always figured. Actually, it falls back into the 'never had to think about it' category.]
You know, I'm really glad that you have multiple organs, now!
This world isn't full of only good people. The fighting wasn't just a hobby back then.
[If you're picking up what he's putting down.]
I started my life in New Cloudbank when I crawled up on the coast. There were lots of people who helped. But there were plenty of people who wanted to take advantage of a young monsterkind, too.
[She knows that, but most people have to deal with shitty individuals who betray them or do some underhanded shit. Rare is the human individual that has to come onto the scene constantly fighting, defending, and protecting themselves every moment until they established themselves. It's kind of a big difference.]
So, why ... [No, that's not the right way to say it, so she goes for another approach.]
So, you must have gotten used to being alone, then.
I was already alone, if you want to look at it that way. I never spoke to a person until I found my way here. All my interactions with life up until that point were fight-or-flight.
[You know, it's probably better to just come out with it.]
You're a pretty charming for a guy that's so isolated, Boxer.
[And it did strike her as a little bit odd, because of the misconception that loner-ish types were awkward and didn't enjoy engaging with other people. And also because, well, he seemed entirely on his own even now. He probably had coworkers and she didn't doubt that he tended to meet people similar to how he'd run into her but it didn't seem as if any of them had stuck in his life.
So, yeah, he was incredibly warm and personable for someone who had been alone for so long.]
[Boxer leans in to give her a few slow kisses on her forehead and temples.]
Always liked meeting people, making good impressions...
[Admittedly, part of it is to hide his insecurities. It became a survival mechanism in a way...just as much as part of his personality. He's still shy, but that's no reason to be the best he can be.]
[.... Man, somehow she can't get to the thought she's trying to communicate, but maybe that means it's better to keep it to herself. It's something that happens every so often and since it's not as if they won't see each other again she lets it go with his kisses.]
I'm not sure you could make a bad impression even if you wanted to.
[There's a little snicker that follows.] You're the sweetest killer monster I ever met on a beach I wasn't supposed to be sunbathing on.
[For a guy that can turn ships into tinder he's really too damn sweet. And she always wants kisses! They're never a bad idea.]
And it's just been awful! From the non-judgement about my eating habits to actually experiencing an epic sex life again! You have to know that I've been absolutely miserable the whole time, Boxer.
[She can't even make it through half of that with a straight face, and to make up for it she tries to catch him in a real kiss.] It's been so bad that I haven't learned my lesson, you might be stuck with me for a bit.
[Annd there she goes, dissipating into an excited bout of giggles while she pretends to move away from his play biting - which she doesn't do a very good job in the first place, since it's not as if she doesn't want him as close as possible. Her hand finds a place on his nearest shoulder and she might try to keep him a little close.]
So I have a lot to look forward to from the maybe future boyfriend.
[Frankly she's incredibly tempted to throw out the idea that they need more time to safely use those terms. He's definitely boyfriend material from where she's sitting, and two weeks or six weeks isn't going to change that.]
[She's starting to catch onto the little hints of self-deprecation, but it's fine. He can tear himself down all he wants, she'll just keep trying to build him up over and over again. It's a sober thought in and of itself, but what he says outweights her sentiment entirely.]
I know what you mean, turns out you're an amazing date.
[And smart, funny, kind, and sexy. It's an unfair combination.]
No, I'm afraid you've seen everything that the tour has to offer.
[She gives into the need for one more kiss, just a little little peck that lands on one corner of his lips.] So I guess that means you're taking me back home again!
[He's really got a thing about bringing in the wayward, single strays.]
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Absolutely none. But now I have to wonder why you're so concerned.
[What is he planning that might make him think of possible allergies to begin with?]
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[He gives a benign shrug.]
It's for future reference too.
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[And do note that she didn't say 'eggs' but just 'egg'. One egg by itself! Anything more than that and she gets distracted and ends up burning it all. Do you know how exhausting it is to cook eggs one at a time in the morning, Boxer? It's ridiculous.]
Speaking of that, I need to ask you a really stupid, very human question. [And never one to draw out her own suffering she'll just go ahead and pop out with it.] Does it feel weird if you eat sea food?
[Because, yeah, he's a predator and all that, and an incredibly big one at that! But aren't they like ... His distant, much stupider cousins or something ...]
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He might be able to teach her how to cook, but their schedules might not allow it, given that they'll probably choose to spend their time...otherwise. Maybe he could have her help? He has to make an awful lot of food just for himself, after all. It'd make it go a lot faster if he trained her to be his little sous chef.]
If I eat--
[He has to hold back outright laughing. He's mostly successful.]
Nariko, what do you think an apex predator of the deep sea would usually eat?
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Once she catches a hint of that laugh she pouts at him a bit!!! ] I mean, clams or something! [As if that would begin to sate a man with such a big frame.] I mean, so is it kind of like humans eating cows, then?
[Mostly she's just trying to understand, it's one of those little things that keeps sticking out no matter how much she tries to bury it in the back of her head.]
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Pretty sure the most clam I'll be eating is yours in a little while.
[Oho! See what he did there? He tries to make it sound as sleazy as possible just to make it clear he isn't just hitting on her for the sake of hitting on her.]
I guess so. I'll eat almost anything that moves in the water, though. Even the poisonous ones.
[Not that the Portuguese man-o-war is like, exceptionally tasty or something, but he has and he will because he can.]
Hell, I even eat calamari. I love calamari.
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It's just ...
She reaches down to grab a tentacle and hold it to her chest. Let her love you, Rudalfo.]
That - How is that okay.
[It's not!!! Poor tentacles. The only way she can really understand this is to literally imagine eating a human arm or something which is pretty horrifying!]
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Oh no, the christening has already begun? Rudalfo caresses her cheek affectionately while she hugs it.]
Nariko! They eat each other all the time! It's like--
[What's it like...]
Humans eating pigs. It's not like people make calamari out of kraken! The muscle is too tough to eat.
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Fine. I mean, it's not like I thought you sang 'Under the Sea' with the marine life or anything, but ...
[But she'd never had cause to think about it, so the whole thing felt weirdly fantastical.] As long as no one tries to eat you, it's fine.
[Or at the very least she'll get used to it.]
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[Yeah, he's being very awful tonight.]
If someone did manage to lop one of mine off, though...it'd grow back. Not that I'm planning to let anyone get close enough to do that.
[Because he knows she's gonna be a little shocked at that little tidbit of information.]
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Why would anyone want to?
[While it stands to reason that there are less pleasant ocean denizens the bay is too populated for that kind of violence, right? That's ... Sort of what she'd always figured. Actually, it falls back into the 'never had to think about it' category.]
You know, I'm really glad that you have multiple organs, now!
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[If you're picking up what he's putting down.]
I started my life in New Cloudbank when I crawled up on the coast. There were lots of people who helped. But there were plenty of people who wanted to take advantage of a young monsterkind, too.
[Multiple organs indeed.]
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So, why ... [No, that's not the right way to say it, so she goes for another approach.]
So, you must have gotten used to being alone, then.
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[Mostly fight. Mostly eat.]
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You're a pretty charming for a guy that's so isolated, Boxer.
[And it did strike her as a little bit odd, because of the misconception that loner-ish types were awkward and didn't enjoy engaging with other people. And also because, well, he seemed entirely on his own even now. He probably had coworkers and she didn't doubt that he tended to meet people similar to how he'd run into her but it didn't seem as if any of them had stuck in his life.
So, yeah, he was incredibly warm and personable for someone who had been alone for so long.]
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I'm glad you think so.
[Boxer leans in to give her a few slow kisses on her forehead and temples.]
Always liked meeting people, making good impressions...
[Admittedly, part of it is to hide his insecurities. It became a survival mechanism in a way...just as much as part of his personality. He's still shy, but that's no reason to be the best he can be.]
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I'm not sure you could make a bad impression even if you wanted to.
[There's a little snicker that follows.] You're the sweetest killer monster I ever met on a beach I wasn't supposed to be sunbathing on.
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I could! But I'd feel awful about it.
[Does she want more kisses? 'Cause she's gonna get more for that last comment!]
Are you kidding? You're my latest victim. All of this is just a vicious, elaborate punishment for trespassing on my beach.
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And it's just been awful! From the non-judgement about my eating habits to actually experiencing an epic sex life again! You have to know that I've been absolutely miserable the whole time, Boxer.
[She can't even make it through half of that with a straight face, and to make up for it she tries to catch him in a real kiss.] It's been so bad that I haven't learned my lesson, you might be stuck with me for a bit.
[Hopefully a very lengthy amount of time.]
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[Boxer makes a playful snarl before leaning in and miming that he's biting her neck! How scary!]
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So I have a lot to look forward to from the maybe future boyfriend.
[Frankly she's incredibly tempted to throw out the idea that they need more time to safely use those terms. He's definitely boyfriend material from where she's sitting, and two weeks or six weeks isn't going to change that.]
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[He leaves a few kisses where he mock-bit! But then he relaxes beside her, letting out a relaxed sigh, giving her a sobered sentiment:]
This is the best I've felt in a long time, Nariko.
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[She's starting to catch onto the little hints of self-deprecation, but it's fine. He can tear himself down all he wants, she'll just keep trying to build him up over and over again. It's a sober thought in and of itself, but what he says outweights her sentiment entirely.]
I know what you mean, turns out you're an amazing date.
[And smart, funny, kind, and sexy. It's an unfair combination.]
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[Jury's out on how much he takes that self-depreciation to heart, but the important part is that he is genuinely happy to be with her right now.]
Was there anything else you wanted to show me...?
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[She gives into the need for one more kiss, just a little little peck that lands on one corner of his lips.] So I guess that means you're taking me back home again!
[He's really got a thing about bringing in the wayward, single strays.]
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oops, meant to write "without"
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have i been gone for long enough? smh
ahhhhhhhhhh!!! YOU CAME BACK such joy ;_;
i can't promise i'll be even remotely as active as i used to be but i have missed this terribly
that's cool we can take it one thread at a time if that's easier -- are you doing okay tho?
how could i ever choose though? also: yes!
ehh will start here and wing it. And good!
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