[n_ll]

　
　
more krakenboxer shenanigans feat. nariko

Comments

[n_ll]

Middle Eastern! Been meaning to brush up.

[As for the 'everything'.] Yeah, I kinda gathered when you said you liked Mystery Jans.

[Yuck. Stick with him, babe, he'll feed you better than that.]

[gunslingerqueen]

I'm the best critic you could ask for, I grew up eating the absolute best of it.

[She's also an incredibly soft hearted critic and might not be very good at telling him if he was too far off the mark or not. Luckily Boxer's probably as good at cooking anything he wants as he is charming, so it probably won't be an issue. But the Mystery Jan's comment gets him the hint of her tongue stuck out in his direction.]

Look, it pays to be adventurous and up for anything! That's the 'mystery' part!

[n_ll]

[He rolls his eyes, grinning.]

I wouldn't call "topping a flatbread from the meat trimmings from other flatbreads" an adventure. I call it a heart attack.

[Look at them bickering like they've always been together...]

[gunslingerqueen]

It's the kind of heart attack that makes you stronger for having eaten it. Clearly I will live forever.

[She has Mystery Jan's like every other week, after all.] And it's not the meat trimmings all the time! One week there was Sriracha on it!

[Apparently inconsistency doesn't bother her! ... They're on their way to being a good ol' married couple, it seems!]

[n_ll]

Srirarcha...

[His head bows in disappointed horror. Spicy food! For a tongue so sensitive it can taste the caloric value of food.]

Don't want to break your heart, but there's no spicy food under this roof.

[He's exaggerating; she can hoard all the spicy stuff she wants, just don't trick him into trying it.]

[gunslingerqueen]

[What does he have against Sriracha though??? She's about to ask about the spicy food when ...]

Ohhhh, it's probably too intense, right?

[So of course he wouldn't have anything like that around when most of his senses aren't on the human scale. She waves a hand at that.]

I'll make sure to be very, very careful with it. [She'll have to wash her mouth out before kissing him after eating spicy tacos and such, but that's alright.]

[n_ll]

[Aw. Usually when he runs into a spicy food fanatic they insist that he should try it! Like the previous excursions in palate pain were just figments of his imagination. But no, she instantly understands.

He gives her a soft, fond smile. If anyone was wondering if Nariko was ever ready for a relationship with a monster, let this be evidence that she most definitely is.]

Appreciate it.

[gunslingerqueen]

[She had no desire to burn his tastebuds to utter shit, okay? That's just cruel and inhumane. In-monster-kind. Something. The point remained.]

No problem. I wish I could say that I was willing to give up Diego's Spicy Taco Supremo Special but it's not gonna happen. I'd rather enjoy the taste and then gargle Listerine afterward.

[Granted that might not be anymore pleasant for Boxer's senses.]

They have non-spicy foods, too! Burritos as big as your head.

[Which is saying something.]

[n_ll]

Oh, I know of them.

[He's got a big grin on his face. Will he ever tire of talking about food? Never.]

I like getting the "all you can eat" nacho bowl. The Sizzle-Sweet flavor.

[...which is not nearly as spicy as it sounds--to a human tongue anyway--but uses a lot of different fruits and veggies in their sauce instead. The secret ingredient: banana peppers.

(He knows.)]

[gunslingerqueen]

[Why did she even think he didn't know of them. If she ever finds a restaurant before him it might be something of a miracle. Watch that become their friendly, lifelong competition. Which ultimately means: Even if he doesn't tire of it, he doesn't have to. Because she likes talking about food, too.]

You don't like Mystery Jan's but you'll eat the Sizzle-Sweet flavor that has fifteen thousand different things in it, and you can't even see all of them.

[Explain this to her, Boxer. Please.]

The nacho bowl is good but I never eat enough to justify it. When I was younger I could eat like a garbage disposal, now not so much.

[Considering she still has an obscenely healthy appetite that's saying something.]

[n_ll]

[He actually...gives her a hurt look in response. It looks pretty honest-to-God genuine.]

Can't a monster just enjoy fruit salsa?

[Sure, he can't see them. But he can taste them! That has to count for something.]

[gunslingerqueen]

[The utter look of immediate, regretful horror is just as genuine on her end.]

Yes, of course!!! I'm sorry Boxer, I was just teasing! The Sizzle-Sweet is really, really good! A-And they've even got enough to make it endless!!

[So presumably he wouldn't have to worry about them running out but also

Does she need to hug you, Boxer, to make up for the faux pas? Because she will get up and hug you so tight and apologize profusely.]

[n_ll]

[He...blinks at her for the recoil she's made. She didn't hurt his feelings that badly, as he is the kind to contently disagree on things, but to have one of his favorite things compared to Mystery Jan's? It cuts pretty deep.]

It's okay. I didn't realize you were just teasing.

[A beat.]

It's probably their least popular, so I figured...

[...that she hated it, too.]

[gunslingerqueen]

Is it really? [She hadn't realized, it seemed pretty popular to her!]

Well, in any case, I'd never purposefully make fun of anything that makes you happy, Boxer, whether that's food or a hobby or something else. I really am sorry, and to make it up to you I'm gonna bring you lunch one day! [And then, a little more gently:]

I'll ask them to put thirty thousand flavors in there.

[n_ll]

That's what the waitress told me one day. "If it weren't for you alone, we'd probably take it off the menu!" Of course--she could just be teasing me, too.

[He chuckles.]

You don't need to do that. I love it exactly the way it is.

[gunslingerqueen]

Or she could have been flirting.

[That was certainly a fair possibility.]

But that means I can definitely buy you lunch! [See what happened there? But she's finished eating so she gets up, arranging her utensils on her plate to take them to the sink. She'll do the same if/when he's done! She won't rush him though but won't be messy in his apartment either. Nariko can't cook but she can certainly clean!]

[n_ll]

Oh, thanks!

[Yeah, he's done! And he's very surprised at Nariko's eagerness to help out--it's very appreciated. Oh, she sure is a keeper.]

Imagine we'll be buying each other lunch off and on for a while. [Smirky smirk.]

[gunslingerqueen]

[His plate goes too! And hopefully he won't mind if she just acquaints herself with his sink so that she can wash everything involved.]

At least that, you've kinda won me over, here.

[Dinner, conversation, they're going to watch a movie ... It's a little bittersweet because once upon a time this was her life with someone else. But she won't begrudge a second chance, she'll just clean the little oven if necessary!]

Hey, where do you keep your towels? [She'll need to dry stuff soon!]

[n_ll]

[He points at a door that looks like it's more likely to pass off as a pantry instead of a linen closet. Spoilers: it's both, technically--bathroom and kitchen linens here, bedroom linens in the bedroom closet. He doesn't have a lot of canned goods, but plenty of spices, noodles, and pickled goods.]

Over there. Can't say I've had a guest so eager to help clean up...

[gunslingerqueen]

[You know it's a really good thing she asked then, she wouldn't have guessed the pantry.]

Thanks, handsome.

[Towel obtained, though she does look at Boxer over her shoulder a bit.] I'll stop if you like [She's a little worried he thinks its rude of her.] but I think it's rude to just dirty everything up and not even help!

[A shrug.]

That, and cleaning brings me a deep, personal joy.

[n_ll]

No, no, it's...

[He waves a hand defensively. It seems wrong to call his previous guests rude for not cleaning up, when it was a case of...]

Normally I don't like people digging around my place. I'm a private person.

[A beat.]

But I trust you.

[gunslingerqueen]

[Oh. Well. She's tempted to stop right then and there but ... He just said he was comfortable with it, so it'd be dumb to just drop it all now.]

Oh. [This feels like a weirdly important sign of some kind.] I'm really happy to hear that.

[She raises a washed fork semi-accusingly, though.] But if it starts to bother you again, tell me!

[And then she'll back off.]

[n_ll]

[A smile.] Don't worry. It's pretty obvious when I'm being territorial.

[As monsters tend to be. For now, though...how about that popcorn? Boxer is digging around in his cabinet for the fixin's for caramel popcorn.]

[gunslingerqueen]

I will keep that in mind.

[She'd make a joke about him biting but she's aware of his teeth soooo. In any case, everything is put away in its rightful place after a little tentative searching. She'll let him deal with the popcorn, though.]

Do you mind if I go change? This outfit is cute and all but it's probably outlived its welcome.

[n_ll]

[Yeah, biting isn't really an option. Nibbling, on the other hand, is still on the table.]

Oh, sure. Go make yourself comfortable.

[What'd she bring for PJs, anyway?]