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[He would. He really would hate it, but thankfully, he's absolutely none the wiser.]

Not great.
Can't sleep.
I keep...

[There's a few seconds pause. Boxer really doesn't want her to worry, but he's gotta get it off his chest.]

I keep thinking of her face.
The mother...
When they brought her in to ID him.

[Another pause.]

Then she found out that I was the one that found him.
I guess...
Old prejudices die hard.

[Extrapolate from that what you will.]

[That was a hell of a lot worse than a 'not well'. For a minute, and then almost two she stares at the screen until ash falls on it. Shit.]

it's not your fault. It's easy to blame what might seem obvious, she's just being an asshole. a grieving one.

[A lot of the time they're the same thing, so it's not an insult to this woman that is already something that Nariko wants to become in the future. Being a mother is probably very hard.

Doesn't excuse you from being a douche, though.]

next time anyone accuses you of anything just call me and put me on speakerphone, I'll take it from there.

[Does that joke come across over text? ... Does he know it's only partially a joke?]

Edited 2016-03-12 04:57 (UTC)

I know. But it still hurts.

[He's just a sensitive guy.]

Someone out there thinks I hurt a little boy.
Someone is probably telling all her friends and family that some monster killed her baby.

I could never do that to someone...much less a kid.

[Whether or not he realizes it's a joke, he huffs out a little laugh, a small smile on his face.]

I do those patrols around the city to prevent these kinds of things
So it feels a little bit of a personal failure...
But air-breathers drown quickly.

Looking at the way his body was...
He would've drowned a few hours after I did my sunset patrol.
He was so far out though...
I don't get it.

[She smiles at her phone but it's an aching, almost horrid expression.]

it's going to be a long time before it does anything but hurt. that's why I'm here.

[So he doesn't have to bear the force of it alone. To the rest of that ... It's difficult to formulate a response that isn't an angry scream, because she hates that, too. That anyone might think Boxer would do anything but protect everyone from the smallest human child to the biggest monsterkind. She doesn't think him incapable of aggression, but he's so - The man's just so fucking gentle that it's almost to his own detriment!

So to think of someone insisting that he did it, that he would ever watch someone fade out in the last few seconds, that he might not be made sick by it - It's disgusting.

But she can't be quiet the whole time. He needs her. And it's about him right now - has to be.]

it could have been anything from an accident to a silly prank, Boxer, it's the police's job to figure out. You can't be everywhere in every single moment, and one instance doesn't undo the people you have saved.

[Statistically, it's just impossible.]

Edited 2016-03-12 05:32 (UTC)

Thank you, Nariko.

[It's just what he needed to hear. He's so glad she's in his life--how would he have dealt with this otherwise? He doesn't really have the kind of friendships where he could vent like this and get anything more than a "there, there" and a distant pat on the back.

Not that they're shitty friends. They're just not that close.]

I hope they do.

[Will they tell him if they do? He hopes so. He feels...invested, now.]

Speaking of jobs
What have you been up to today?

They will, it's what they do.

[She sighs and puts her cigarette out. If Boxer's phone is capable of seeing when she's read a message he's sent then the pause in her response might be made that much stranger. Dead bodies and the vague sensation that any little noise will make her vomit and take her back to being eight years old again.]

hey, since you're up can I come over? I'm gonna pass junction jan's on the way if you're hungry.

[She'll probably go anyway, it's always been comfort food.]

[No answer, huh. Must be a long (or uninteresting) story.]

Heck yes. You can probably guess what I want.

[Comfort food and the company of his girlfriend? Sounds like exactly what the doctor ordered.]

of course. Be there in twenty.

[Most of that twenty minutes is cleaning up her desk and putting things in order for tomorrow, the other part of it is calling in the order and dumping her body into her car. She's weirdly tired, maybe because despite her own brain weasels she's been really worried for him.

So a visit really is for the best because she can put eyes on him and feel better for it. Maybe she has a key, maybe she has to knock, but either way she's there.]

Can't wait. <3

[She has a keycard now! To get both into the building and into his apartment. She'll find Boxer sprawled out on the couch, wrapped in a few moisture-keeping blankets as he plays some retro video game, his only present company a bottle of spiced rum that he's made some progress on. Upon her entrance, he waves at her and sits up.]

Hey, Nariko.

Hey, handsome.

[Her purse finds its way onto his counter and she slips out of her heels before just bringing the whole box over, because who the hell needs plates on a night like this? But before the box goes down she kisses him, kind of takes her time with it.]

Missed you.

[The whole thing has kept them apart for an understandable amount of time, and she's used to going on with her own life anyway but ... This was a little different.]

Mmmh. [Kissy kissy.] Missed you too.

[Pretty much instantly after he says that, he pulls back and looks at her with a look that would be utterly bewildered if he wasn't reining it in. Instead, he just kind of...stares at her.

Sniff. Sniff.

Oh. Oh.

Oh boy.

He really doesn't want to get on her case, mostly because he's not in the mood to and she's not in the mood to get chewed on either.

So she'll have to deal with some staring while he tries to figure out the subtle way to tell her you should take a bath because you stink before she sits down and gets said stink on his couch.]

[That's not good staring, certainly not the kind she enjoys.]

What?

[Look, she practically downed half a bottle of mints and still didn't give him tongue, there's no way he could know that she was smoking! Her mouth has such an aggressive spearmint taste that it's actually bothering her. So he has no reason to stare at her like that! Of course she didn't change, and she did have a habit of keeping one behind her ear at work for the past few days so ... It's not as unlikely as she's thinking.

To his probable relief, though, she's so thrown by his reaction that she doesn't sit - just kind of hangs out awkwardly in front of his couch. ]

I, uh...didn't know you smoked.

[Normally he'd give her the benefit of the doubt but he knows enough sailors with the habit that he can tell the difference between "i smoke" and "i just hung out with a smoker". Yes, even over the overwhelming plume of mint she's carrying with her. It's subtle enough for him to not be completely confident in his assumption, but he's not going to take an accusatory tone anyway.]

[Shit.]

I don't - [He could probably see her debating between an outright lie or the truth, and thankfully she falls onto the latter.] ... I used to when I was in college and then I quit.

[Since that's what's bothering him she runs her fingers through her hair and puts a little more space between them in the hopes that it might not bother him as much.] I just - y'know - it's a crutch. Happens when I'm stressed, I'm sorry.

[It's not good for her and if he could give her that look from one whiff then it's going to be too much for him.]

It's okay.

[He...doesn't really sound like it's okay? The truth is that he's not judging her--hell, his own "crutch" is sitting right next to him, but still...]

I'm not upset, [he decides to elaborate with.] It's just...it'll dry out my gills if I have to breathe it in, so...

[Boxer glances at the pizza box. He doesn't want to keep her from eating, but...well, she's seen for herself how fussy his respiratory system can be.]

Could you take a shower? I have some brand new shampoo and conditioner you might like.

[It's pretty much not okay and she knows it, just like she knows it isn't personal but it feels like it is. There's something weirdly embarrassing about your boyfriend telling you to go take a shower because you smell like a bar to him.

But it's not his fault so she slaps on a smile, answers.]

Of course, just give me a bit.

[Soooo, off to his bathroom she goes. This really sucks, but not breathing is actually pretty horrid, too, way more so than the heavy sense of embarrassment she's carrying. And since she's there she'll really scrub at her hair, her scalp especially, and the rest of her body. It probably takes her a good half hour, and it's a blessing that she keeps pajamas at his place, now.]

[He feels bad about it, too. Which is why, despite his hunger, he puts the pizza away in the oven to stay warm while she bathes, because he's not going to eat without her. Instead, he picks up an extra towel for her hair and her aforementioned pajamas--figuring she's going to stay the night--and leaves them on a plastic tray just outside of the bathroom door for her to pick up at her leisure.

When he does, though, he peeks his head in.]

Want me to mix a drink for you?

[She should be pretty familiar with what he keeps in inventory by now!]

[Frankly the privacy does her good - it keeps her from snapping at him for reasons that aren't his fault, it gives her time to decompress a little. It's a strange thing, to need to be near him without immediately talking, to be comforted by his presence without the physicality that often goes with it. Maybe it's actually a good thing and she'll put better words to it later on, but when he sticks his head the smile she gives him is far more genuine. It might also look a bit funny since she's got her sudsy fingers in her hair.]

I think I'm supposed to be taking care of you. [Not the other way around. But, still.] Vodka hiding in the form of a White Russian?

[Hell she might just drink the whole bottle of vodka and leave it at that.]

[Boxer kinda gets the feeling that he shouldn't impose on her right now. He couldn't articulate why, specifically, just a feeling in his gut.]

Coming right up.

[And with that, he leaves her alone to process, whatever that might actually entail. Funny or not, he's not laughing.

He has a heavy hand, after all, and not just in a literal sense; he mixes just the right drink for her in a tall glass, and he keeps it by his bottle of rum next to the couch for her to pick up when she wants it.]

[When she's pretty damn positive that the entirety of the smell is off of her body and hair she turns the water off and ... The sight of her pajamas and the extra towel is nice. She has a really nice boyfriend. Given another few minutes Nariko comes back, and though she doesn't want to be she's a little cautious about stepping near him.]

Better?

[She washed six times as opposed to the usual three, it has to be gone.]

[He leans in and gives her a sniff sniff sniff. All she smells like is shampoo and conditioner now!]

Yeah. You smell great.

[He holds out his hands, gesturing for a hug.]

Thanks, Nariko. It means a lot that you'd do that for me.

[... She really wants that hug so before anything else she goes right into his arms, more than happy to sidle right up onto him now that there's no breathing hazard. If he lets her she'll practically curl herself up on him.]

You don't have to thank me, I kind of want you to breathe! Turns out I really like your voice, and your ability to live.

[She kisses the base of his neck.] I'm sorry, I got a little stupid about it, to be honest.

[And they both know that she did, so he won't do himself any favors pretending it isn't true.] It's just been a weird few days. [But it was more than that, really.] I wanted to be here for you. I know it probably wouldn't have mattered, they make you talk to five million people, the rooms are cramped, everyone's always buzzing around - I swear, there's nothing more mentally exhausting than a police station, or the ME's office. [Although that was more emotionally taxing than anything else.]

But I still wish I'd been here every time you got home. [Just so - just so that he wasn't alone. So she could magically take care of him somehow. This is almost the full extent of her mother henning but she's so tired and done with her own emotional smoke and mirrors that she doesn't care how it makes her look right now.]

[Curl away, Nariko. He'll reciprocate by blanketing her legs with his tentacles, supporting her back with a massive arm, wrapping it around her upper back and resting his hand against her thigh. With two free tentacles, he wheels the both of them back into the kitchen to fetch the flatbread while keeping her in his embrace.]

It's not that big of a mistake when you're willing to make up for it.

[He gives her a little kiss in her damp crown.]

You're here now, and that's what matters.

[And because of it, he already feels a lot better. Less lonely, less objectified in the sense that it felt like all he was really good for was regurgitating the same information over and over again.

He'll let go of his hug around her, but not the tentacles, as he pulls the flatbread from the oven and brings it to the kitchen table. She doesn't even have to get out of his lap, they can just cuddle and eat just like this.

He's not making it easy for an alternative, anyway.]

[For once she isn't particularly hungry, but she also can't remember the last time she ingested something that wasn't nicotine based or coffee, so even though looking at food gives her that weird nauseous feeling she gets a piece anyway. It's an incredible shame that she can't appreciate Jan's right now because it really is great.]

Can I stay here for a little while?

[It might be strange that she's asking at all, she's not above staying for a weekend or a night or two during the week, but there's something a little more resolute, definitive to the question.]

[Yeah, you should probably eat, Nariko. Just take it slowly, and don't touch your drink yet.]

As long as you don't mind me getting flatbread crumbs on your boobs.

[He, uh, missed the intent of her question, but it's hard to argue when he gives her a teasing little nudge in the temple with his nose.]

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